Sticks, Stones, and a Work Nickname You Can't Shake

Getting fired. Being publicly shamed or humiliated in front of coworkers. Privately receiving harsh feedback. Getting put on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP), or getting an unexpected negative performance review. 

These are the bulk of what many consider to be traumatic workplace experiences.

I’ve been through a couple from that list myself, so I’m pretty empathetic when others mention them in describing where they struggle most in their search for a career change. Interviewing is hard to begin with, but interviewing when a wound is fresh or unhealed can be even harder. A question about a previous job can feel triggering and steer an interview in a direction one was hoping to avoid.

Watching Andrew McCarthy’s Brats documentary on Hulu was like being transported into the middle of one of these conversations.

Like many, I grew up on the Brat Pack movies. The Breakfast Club was one of the few VHS tapes I had in my college dorm room, so it was on steady rotation. I always knew those deemed as members weren’t fans of the moniker, but I imagined they mostly just got sick of answering questions about it more than anything. 

Watching Brats, it quickly becomes apparent how the stain of that name haunted some more than others. The film focuses on McCarthy reconnecting (or trying to in some cases) with his fellow Brat Packers to uncover who was actually in the loosely defined group, how they felt about it then, and what impact it had on their careers and lives. 

More importantly it shows the wide array of responses to the nickname amongst those associated with it. In archival interview footage from the 1980s and current interviews for this film — Demi Moore, Rob Lowe, and John Cryer almost seem unbothered by it. All three of them went on to have careers that made their Brat Pack status almost seem like a blip in the road.

McCarthy clearly struggled with it for years though. He successfully continued to work steadily as an actor well after the 1980s, so it’s not as if he couldn’t get work. But unlike the aforementioned three, his career didn’t go on to have a Ghost, a Parks & Recreation, or a Two and a Half Men mega-hit.

It’s as if he’s still consciously working towards being unbothered by it now, but isn’t quite there yet.

“It felt like I lost control of the narrative of my career. - Andrew McCarthy in Brats

Four decades later, McCarthy’s reclaiming control of the narrative, so it will be interesting to see where he goes from here in his career.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names can never hurt me.”

David Blum, the writer who coined the phrase Brat Pack, alludes to this adage in the film. He still stands behind what he wrote, and in the film admits to McCarthy he thought it was all “sticks and stones” when writing his 1985 New York Magazine cover article that followed the group of young actors since.

Scene from “St. Elmo’s Fire”, the movie that birthed the name Brat Pack

The two hash it out and seem to leave on good terms. But it begs the question; did anyone ever really believe that old adage? Or is “sticks and stones” merely children’s first encounter with the concept of being gaslit? 

On a similar topic to broken bones… 

I have knee surgery scheduled this week for a complex meniscus tear. After scheduling the operation, I was immediately reminded of an analogy I once heard about people who stick around in jobs they’re unhappy with for too long.

When you break a bone you go see a doctor right away so it heals quickly.

If it’s not a break but it’s injured, it takes longer to heal because you are still able to keep walking on it. So you don’t take care of it or let it heal. Eventually other parts of the body may be required to overcompensate for it and cause more damage.

I have no recollection of a knee injury, but I’ve had this pain since August of last year. I could still walk fine and do most physical activities other than running. I thought I was being proactive in getting xrays done and going to PT, but an eventual MRI showed otherwise.

Hopefully I’ll be back to normal in about 6 weeks, but it goes to show how easy it is to ignore something serious that isn’t “that bad” for a prolonged period. 

Worry more about your injuries that don’t break your bones. The physical and emotional ones. The personal and professional ones.

🎵 Now Streaming 🎵

Brats on Hulu would be too easy of a choice here.  You should still watch it though.

The discussion on John Hughes' interest in movies, both for and about youth, and his appreciation of British synth pop changing the culture of movies and their accompanying music is pretty fascinating.

This one’s not British synth pop, but it captures the hair, angst, and cheese of 1980s music to a tee. It’s also from St. Elmo’s Fire which was the film that led to Blum’s infamous feature article that blessed some of us and cursed others with the Brat Pack

John Parr- St. Elmo’s Fire (Man In Motion) 

Sincerely yours,

Personal Sprints

P.S. how were Anthony Michael Hall, Robert Downey Jr., and James Spader not recognized as being at least Brat Pack adjacent?